Serving the area since 1947

The Boring Word About... is an editorial column created and written by editor Georgia Boring and advertising manager Charlene Word in the 1980s. The Boring Word About... makes an occasional reappearance in current issues and can have any member of the family as an author. Each week on Friday, we offer one of these historic columns for your enjoyment.

Coming of Age

November 19, 1986

Some people feel you have started down the other side of life when you hit 40. Others are convinced it’s when you are 50 and still others want to pin the time on when the last child goes off to school. But none of those days really marks the change in your life as much as the day the doctor says, “You need bifocals!”

If there is one thing both men and women seem to put off it’s that day when they finally admit they have to get bifocals. The reality has a tendency to sneak upon you. One for the first signs is when you and your husband begin a small battle in church as to how far away to hold the shared hymnal. That problem is usually solved by using two books.

The next plateau arrives when you can no longer read the fine print in the newspaper or the directions on the medicine bottle. This can be solved for a while by taking off your regular glasses. However, it’s not too long before you find yourself spending great amounts of time searching for the glasses you removed in order to read something. At our house my husband has reached this point and our children are threatening to place a beeper on the glasses they are constantly being sent to search for.
At this stage children can be a mixed blessing since you can sometimes get them to read the fine print or thread a needle for your but at the same time they can leave telephone messages you will never decipher.

The day finally arrives when your arms are no longer long enough to enable  you to read the headlines much less the body type and you make the trip to the doctor for your new bifocals. (In my case it took breaking the old ones before I would go.)

Try as you may, you can no longer read those little letters on the eye chart and the fateful diagnosis is made. Before long you are stepping off curbs too soon, developing a stiff neck and swearing you will never get used to bifocals. But get used to them you do... then all you have to do is think ahead to the day when you may need trifocals!

GCB

Starting Over

April 9, 1986

We’ve just entered into a new phase of our marriage which no one had warned me about. I was ready for the changes a baby brings to your marriage, for the trauma when the last of the children go off to school, I’ve through about the empty nest syndrome and considered life after retirement. But I was not prepared when we had to start shopping for appliances again.

Like most newly marrieds we saved our money and then in one year, just before our first baby arrived, we bought: a washer, dryer, refrigerator, dishwasher, freezer and stove. Since that year I’ve thought very little about my appliances and I certainly didn’t spend my time reading the ads and pricing new items.
So when the refrigerator died last year, followed by the washer and dryer this year I was not ready for the experience of buying new ones. I headed out to the stores remembering the excitement of those first purchases. But somehow it was just not the same. For one thing my husband was conveniently busy so it was our teenage son who went along to measure the sizes and check out the connections.

While he became enthralled with all the latest innovations I was appalled at the price tags. At no time had I even dreamed that a washer-dryer combination could cost $1500! Granted some models do cost less. But drop the price by very much and you may come home with a washboard.

Refrigerators come in so many different models and sizes that I couldn’t keep them straight. To think I just wanted to keep the ice cubes frozen!

And everything has a digital clock. I estimate that with a microwave, a stove, refrigerator (yes, they not only have clocks but will also tell you the temperature of the inside of the refrigerator and the kitchen), and washer/dryer combo in your kitchen you could have a clock in view at all times. With all the electronic controls, LEDs and push buttons the modern kitchen is beginning to look like the flight deck of a space ship. I know one thing, if I’m going to take off for a flight into space (or anywhere else for that matter) I have no intention of taking my appliances with me.

Since we put the washer and dryer in last week I have been eying my other appliances warily. It only stands to reason that if we purchased them all at the same time they are going to fall apart at the same time. I have even begun reading the ads for dishwashers and stoves. But before I take the plunge again I may consider the alternative eating all our meals out.

GCB